It's Quiet ... Too Quiet.

I’ve often stated my belief that Moscow is a lot like New York. And I’ve had to defend that position on multiple occasions. No one really believes it. They begin to understand, however, when I couch my argument in terms of the abstract concepts of life in these two dynamic cities. But I’m more than willing to admit that sometimes Moscow city life is just too radically different to fit into my philosophy.

In the metro the other day, I stood near two drunk guys on the train. Not especially unusual. But as they sat on their large bags from the market, I noticed that they were communicating through sign language. And I wondered to myself – do deaf people slur their words when they’re drunk? Does loss of motor control extend all the way down to the finger tips and affect clarity of communication? I’m quite sure that they talk nonsense just like the rest of us, but I have to admit that the sign-language thing has me stumped.

Regardless, it was an opportunity to reflect on the things that I’ve seen in the metro. Like mass transit anywhere, you come across the occasional person toting something unexpected. A guy with skis, for example, or some sort of machine part. It’s more pronounced a phenomenon in NYC, I think, where it’s common to see people with bikes and street vendors carrying their wares. Here in Moscow, that behavior is a bit dissuaded by a tariff on articles over a certain volume. It seems that it would be difficult to fake your way through in the well-staffed and well-policed metro system here.

But something else stands out compared to New York – if only by its absence. Crazy people. I haven’t seen a single crazy person in the metro since my arrival. I don’t mean the mildly weird person with suspect reading materials. I mean the hysterical, shouting loonies. Is this a medical-social phenomenon that isn’t present in Russia? That seems unlikely given human nature and the appearance of hysterical, shouting loonies in Russian history – sometimes as national leaders.

A local colleague suggested that there genuinely isn’t quite such a problem here – he’s lived in New York before and agrees with me about the different characteristics of the respective riderships. His alternative theory is that craziness is evenly spread across the population of Russia – everyone here is just a little bit nuts and that, he maintains, accounts for a lot of things.

Maybe he’s right. In a place where everyone is a little bit crazy, no one person would stand out. In fact, the word crazy might even cease to exist or have never been invented. But the language puts the lie to that theory – Russian has many eloquent ways to express your doubts about someone else’s mental health.

So, I’m not sure I buy his hypothesis. I just wonder why the truly insane don’t feel compelled to ride the metro as they somehow do in New York.

Anyway, there’s a certain beauty and hopeful nature to the belief that everyone here is a little bit crazy. It makes me believe that I can fit after all.