Happy Holidays - Call it What You Will

If Lucy Van Pelt, the lemonade-stand psychiatrist from Peanuts, were to give a diagnosis of Russia she might say that this country has a lot of “baggage”. A rather creaky autocracy gave way to a not-always-so-rational communist totalitarianism. The 20th century has left the country with a lot of challenges that need to be addressed. The Russians have conquered some, struggled with others, and have some more that they have yet to face. In all, I believe that they’re doing a good job. But in one area, at least, history has provided a clear advantage over the annual hand-wringing in the US. And that’s the Holidays.

The communists tried to do away with Christmas, but eliminating a fun holiday is unlikely to be popular or particularly successful. So in the Soviet Union all the non-religious trappings of the Christian holiday migrated to New Year’s. An old man with a flowing white beard still leaves presents under a decorated pine tree. Except here he’s Дед Мороз (Dyed Moroz) - Father Frost - leaving New Year’s presents under the New Year’s tree.

The result of this, after some 70 years of official atheism, is that the two holidays are distinct and separate. Everyone participates in the New Year’s festivities. And a few days later on Jan 6th (the date of Russian Christmas), Christians are now free to celebrate the religious holiday with traditional foods and church services, etc. No messy mingling of the secular and religious.

This year, the US seems to be going through a particularly bitter battle in the culture wars with its arguments over “Merry Christmas” vs. “Happy Holidays” and whether or not that’s symbolic of a nefarious, creeping plan to de-Christianize our end-of-year rituals. It seems to me that Christians have done a pretty good job of de-christianizing it ourselves; some churches are closing this year since Christmas inconveniently falls on a Sunday. Anyway, momentarily reflecting on the true spirit of the holiday before tearing into a pile of gifts that represent the GDP of a small African nation isn’t exactly keeping things kosher, in my opinion.

One of my favorite writers, David Sedaris, penned an essay where he said that the two surefire ways to understand a foreign culture were to ask about their gun laws and their Christmas myths. Russian Christmas isn’t as scandalous as his story of the “7 to 10 black men” from the Netherlands, but there’s room for gossip.

Father Frost is always accompanied by Снегурочка (Snegurochka) - Snow Maiden. She’s from an ancient Russian fable about a lonely old couple who made a daughter out of snow to keep them company. She came to life, but melts each spring and returns each winter to visit them. It’s a lot like Frosty the Snowman but a little more melancholy. No button eyes or carrot nose here, though; Snegurochka is always portrayed as a very beautiful young woman in traditional peasant costume. No one has been able to sufficiently explain her exact relationship to Ded Moroz, so I’m inclined to believe the worst.

Its all very similar to St. Nick, or Santa, or whatever you call the standard Anglo-American version of the jolly elf. But there’s something rather weird about the persistence of such a mythos when it clearly alienates its primary target audience. Children around the world seem to be terrified of meeting the annual gift man. They cry, they scream, or they simply freeze up. I saw this at GUM this weekend as Ded Moroz and Snegurochka walked through the massive department store.

This was a particularly evil incarnation of visiting Santa at the Mall. No long line, no time to prepare, no warning. Happily shopping with mom and dad until you turn the corner and BANG – face to face with roaming Dyed Moroz AND Snegurochka! It’s like the childhood equivalent of standing before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates answering for all your sins.

Except in the world of children, the stakes may even be higher.

I don’t know if Dyed Moroz and Snegurochka did any good-cop bad-cop interrogation, but it was hilarious to see the reactions of these kids to double-barreled questioning. Most of them simply shut down – saucer eyes and subdued nodding in response to questions. I can empathize. Father Frost carries a huge staff with a rather pointy looking star at the end. And Snegurochka – well, I always freeze up when talking to pretty girls.

Anyway, Russian Christmas looks like ours in a lot of ways – presents, decorations, same underlying messages of family and loved ones. Its just that they’re doing a much better job than we are of keeping different ideas separate and not letting some trivial arguments ruin the whole thing.